Perspectives on Sex Work and Trafficking

Do I look Different? A photo from my first session as a professional Dominant!

I read a lot about sex work, intersectional feminism, human trafficking, sexuality education, sex toys, legalities concerning what one can do with their own body, BDSM, immigration, racial bias, policing, current scientific understanding of trans bodies and lives, health as it pertains to STIs and pregnancy, mental health, emotional growth, queerness, and how human behavior can make or break communities. I’m also a sex worker who communicates regularly with other sex workers from a variety of backgrounds and within different sectors of the industry, about our collective experiences. Recently, specifically in response to the massage parlor raid in Florida involving a high profile client, I’ve found myself joining a number of discussions with people outside sex work to explain the difference between sex work and sex trafficking. These issues are vital to understand as separate-yet-connected realities in order to pursue meaningful legislation, reduce harm, and protect the greatest number of people. It’s important that we decipher between humanitarian response and policing based on misinformation or personal morality agendas. In this article I’ve linked to a number of writings and resources which have helped me better understand these issues. Action is important, but action without understanding can make things worse—historically affecting victims, minorities, and marginalized people most destructively. We can do better. Following are some ideas about how.

1. Understand that Sex work and sex trafficking are distinct and separate issues. The media, police force, and politicians often do more harm than good when these realities are conflated. There’s also an important grey area to be delineated in this conversation concerning “survival sex workers” and their needs. Until we can decipher between these groups of people and their situational needs, legislation cannot be truly effective, and often errs on the side of harm.

2. Decriminalization vs. Legalization of sex work: This article makes a lot of really important points, and is a great read. It’s generally agreed upon by sex workers, clients, and global advocacy groups (like Amnesty International) that decriminalization is the most responsible and least harmful way to approach legislation when addressing sex work as a vocation. Some highlights in that conversation are:

  • Legalization of sex work creates separate classes of workers. The privileged class is that of sex workers who are “legally” engaged in sex work, as defined by having successfully jumped through bureaucratic hoops—which are usually not legislated in tandem with suggestions from sex workers themselves. A second lesser class of worker results from those who haven’t (for any number of reasons) successfully jumped through the bureaucratic hoops in place, and so are considered “illegal workers” and so become further vulnerable to both officials and predators. In practice, classism disproportionately negatively effects marginalized people including workers who are immigrants, PoC, trans, drug users, and survival sex workers. “Legalization” systemically favors white, cis, and less poverty stricken sex workers. It is not socially just nor an equitable route to take.
  • Partial Decriminalization (or partial legalization) includes the “Nordic model”, aka “Swedish model”, aka “what they do in Germany”. In this model the selling of sex work is decriminalized, yet the buying of sexual services remains against the law. This arrangement of criminality puts clients in the position of fearing legal retribution as they seek services which are legal to sell. This causes problems for sex workers most significantly down the line. People who are afraid of prosecution generally do not want to be vetted by workers, they are less likely to give accurate information to workers when asked, and are less likely to allow sex workers the time they need to evaluate whether or not they are a safe client to interact with. The fallout from situations like these is an increase of abuse to workers themselves, and pressure to work in less safe situations in order to receive an income.
  • Things to know about decriminalization: decriminalizing sex work does not change the status of sex trafficking. Trafficking remains illegal and is separately defined from consensual sex work.
  • Within decriminalization underage sex is still defined as sex trafficking and should be prosecuted as such.
  • Decriminalization of consensual sex work helps authorities and trafficking advocates narrow their focus and resources to those victimized by trafficking and abuse. When less time, energy, and money is wasted on adults involved in consensual sexual trade, authorities are left with more resources to seek out perpetrators of trafficking and abuse violations.
  • Decriminalization of sex work helps sex workers and victims of sex trafficking report abuse to the authorities without fear of retribution or further harm befalling them as consequence.
  • Decriminalization in the USA has already been studied, as it was decriminalized for 6 years in Rhode Island between 2003-2009. Two numbers of note that have been published about that period of time are that cases of gonorrhea went down by around 40% statewide, and police reports of rape went down by about 30%.

3. What is FOSTA/SESTA? the impact of FOSTA and SESTA on actual sex workers has been discussed since well before either bill was voted on last year. Recently there have been updates published about the fallout from these bills—and it turns out that sex workers were right about how it would effect their industries and personal safety. In addition, these bills have effected the internet as a whole, our national discourse on sexuality, and the experiences of non sex workers navigating person to person platforms such as dating websites, while increasingly dealing with censorship or placed in harm’s way.

4. Sex worker clientele: How is it possible to have a healthy and respectful relationship with service providers? Sex work is an issue which involves many communities of people, and clients are as much a part of the conversation as sex workers are. There are as many reasons why clients seek out the help of sex workers as there are clients. There are as many reasons to become a sex worker as there are workers.

So, why are we making this issue largely about women and victims (frequently framing women most comfortably as victims too)? Consider that men (and clients who are not men) comprise an important half of this discussion. We cannot meaningfully talk about the needs of workers and/or how to help people who are victimized by trafficking, if we can’t accept the reality that these situations stem from the needs or desires of actual people first. In this era of “me too” it’s vitally important to be having conversations about how the patriarchy and toxic definitions of masculinity hurt all of us regardless of gender, sex, or which side of the provider/client/victim-of-violence slash one finds themself on.

5. It’s important to acknowledge that white people and cis straight men disproportionately profit off industries which fetishize people of color and other marginalized people. This is evident in the sex industry too. This is evident when we assume immigrants and people of color are automatically victims of trafficking, or call for clients to hire what amounts to white women or well-off providers in order to be “socially responsible clients”. This is evident when we don’t rise up and call bullshit when black and brown strippers are paid less, given worse shifts, and hired less frequently than white workers are. This is evident when we automatically decide that third parties (“pimps”, booking agents, agency owners, etc.) never have the safety and welfare of sex workers in mind, rather than digging deeper into what different demographics of workers prefer or need individually. This also gets into whether or not we trust and believe marginalized people when they tell us about their lives.

6. After learning about these issues one may be left feeling lost as to what to do. There are many ways to help effect change. From discussing what you’ve learned with the people around you, to not tolerating derogatory statements which objectify sex workers or demonize their clients when voiced by friends, co-workers, and family. Volunteering for the sex work advocacy or end-human-trafficking organization you feel most connected to is a solid start, as is writing your elected officials.

Consider whether or not you think these issues are ones which pertain to you, your friends, family, associates, or people whose struggles you care to acknowledge. We’re all connected. We each play a part.

7. Sex work isn’t just something other people engage in—if you’ve ever watched porn you’re part of the tapestry depicting how sexuality and capitalism effect us all. As an exercise: think about why you might be interested in (or turn to) pornography, erotica, strip clubs, cam rooms, phone sex, professional Dominants/submissives/switches, instructional books and video, sex therapists, sex surrogates, sensual and/or sexual massage providers, sexological body workers, full service sex workers, sacred sexuality guides, escorts, sugar relationships, swinger’s clubs, live sex performances, commercial dungeons, sex and kink conventions, or any other iteration of paid (or often unpaid—be aware of what this also means) assistance catering to your sexual impulses or desires. Sex work is work. I’m sure you can easily list a number of common reasons people pay for sex and sex adjacent services. Prioritize access to safe and respectful spaces for sex workers to provide. Protect the bulk of our resources in doing so. Prosecute traffickers and those who abuse.

The very ways we depict, legislate, and police these interconnected concerns must be more transparently examined, and they must change.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

This writing takes time, research, and consideration. It is my art.
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Exploring Double Think as it Pertains to the Sexual Body

Do I look Different? A photo commemorating the first time I was paid to professionally Dominate!

Does a muscular man moving heavy boxes from one apartment to another deserve to be paid for his labor?

What if he’s good looking?

What if he’s friendly, and chats or flirts with you while he does his job?

What if you’re turned on watching him use his body for your benefit?

What if you specifically hired him for the job because of your attraction to him?

Why would a woman moving her body to the rhythm of music, who’s often employing years of dance training, social grooming, and a deep understanding of how to navigate social norms with an eye to her own safety, who’s certainly maintaining a physical lifestyle on and off the stage (which is what allows her to do this work in shoes which are far less than ideal), not be afforded the same obvious answer?

“I want a sugar baby relationship, but I don’t consider myself a sugar daddy, and I don’t want to date a stripper or anything like that.” This is an actual sentence someone said to me this week. It’s not the first time I’ve heard this sentiment (by far), and it comes off comically quaint, disturbing, harmful, and dripping with ignorance every time I hear it.

We pay for things we appreciate in this society. We pay with money, and frequently emotional, psychological, and intellectual labor too. Money is a part of how we literally put value on that which we admire, support, and wish to spend time with or acquire. This is a consumerist and predominantly capitalist nation, after all. There are plethora reasons individuals engage in various forms of sex work, both as workers and as clients. I would say that most of these reasons are personal, and at one point or another almost everyone has done it. Who hasn’t watched porn, read erotica, been to a strip club, paid to learn about various sexual or sensual techniques (reading books, instructional videos, and taking classes counts), or any other number of arousing activities with price tags attached?

Our culture’s limited and deeply judgmental conversation about what adults are allowed to negotiate consensually with one another in private or in spaces designed for adult sexual and sensual activity is steeped in layers of misogyny and almost always hypocritical when broken down into parts for examination.

One glaring example of this I’ll point to, is that when we talk about sex workers we’re generally not talking (or often even thinking) about male sex workers. Unless you’re a gay man (and sometimes even if you are), let’s be honest about that for a minute. Male strippers, escorts, sensual massage practitioners, full service sex workers, professional Doms, sugar babies, and pool boys — cis, trans, bi, gay, or straight — are not the people we’re characterizing as hussies, wh*res, pr*stitutes, or sluts. We don’t usually entertain thoughts of the men who service clients for money when we invoke the idea of a “sex worker”. When we do think of them it’s often with a certain emotional curiosity, eroticized amusement, as the punchline of a whimsical joke, or (often in the case of the gay community) with a certain respect of position and normalized-to-nonchalant acceptance.

Mainstream culture is literally invested in mandating that women, trans people, and people of color not have the benefit of pay when it comes to capitalization off of the objectification and sexualization of their own bodies. The only caveat to this is when someone else (usually male, and frequently white, cis, and heterosexual) is selling the product and profiting as well, as is the case with most porn production, strip clubs, brothels, and pretty much all of the advertising industry.

Historically, women, queers, and people of color have occupied the teaching, dominant, and practitioner roles when it comes to community highlighted and/or ritualized sexual exploration. Consider the histories of sacred intimates, to some extent concubines and courtesans, and the titillating romanticism surrounding Dominatrices. How can these historical practices and the archetypes which accompany them — so seemingly natural to the human condition — be traditionally maintained and yet so thoroughly and consistently demonized, subjugated, abused, killed, and terrorized? I mean, duh, “Patriarchy” — but let’s unravel that a little bit and delve into our own brains searching for clues. I offer a few musings relating to the unexamined politics and hang-ups I’ve observed many people have concerning sex work and sexual autonomy. Enjoy. And think about it:

If you believe in a woman’s autonomy but have a problem with her choosing what she can do with her body, with whom, or how much monetary value she can attach to her time and actions: you probably shouldn’t be having sex.

If you support blue-collar workers and unions, but you have a problem with sex work or are not for decriminalization of sex work: you might be a hypocrite.

If you believe in trickle down economics and entrepreneurialism, but you’re against sex work: you’re definitely a hypocrite.

If you watch porn and still think of sex work as a joke: you have a deep misunderstanding of your own desires and behaviors.

If you enjoy going to strip clubs, but wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with a stripper: take a long, hard, think about what that means and why you feel that way. Do you think that people who engage in sex work don’t have sustainable private lives? That they are always promiscuous? Can’t love their partners deeply? Are cheaters? What do your answers to these questions say about you — the person who enjoys patronizing places where strippers enact their profession?

If you don’t understand that strippers, cam performers, pro Doms, full-service sex workers, sugar babies, and all the other people with jobs which require performance of sexuality of some type or another, are people with families, complicated lives, basic needs, bills to pay, and that they experience the full range of human desires and responsibilities you do: you’re dripping with misogynistic reasoning, and are probably transphobic and racist to boot. Think about how these ideas are connected and how you might want to adjust your understandings in honor of these complications.

If the idea of women doing sex work makes you uncomfortable, squicked, angry, or anything other than hopeful they have a safe life and are in a good situation, yet the idea of men doing sex work seems funny, sexy, unimaginable, or fantastical: you’re out of touch with reality and perpetuating misogyny. If you’re a woman or queer person who thinks this way, you’ll want to work on self loathing issues.

If you don’t believe sex work is work: reconsider your position. Educate yourself on how sex workers actually function in their daily lives to maintain their bottom line.

If you don’t believe that objectification should be a consensual activity and a choice to engage in or not by the individual being objectified: Go apologize to every woman, queer, POC, and other minority person you know. Seriously, think about it.

If you don’t understand the difference between legalization and decriminalization: do some research on decriminalization to understand how it works and why it’s a better, more all encompassing option for safety, meaningful infrastructure, and empowered workers and clients. Decriminalization is what sex workers want, and even what Amnesty International calls for. If you support sex workers you should care about how sex workers believe their own industries should be run.

What other thoughts, complexities, or questions come up for you while examining these subjects?

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

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~Thank you.

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