There’s Magic in the Middle

Make-up and chin hairs: as I grow into my masculinity I am enjoying more and more my femme reality.

Kinky Transboy seeks Slow and Hot (Providence)

body: fit
eye color: blue
facial hair: hopefully one day
height: 5’3″ (160cm)

age: 39

I am genderfluid/nonbinary trans (ftm). Attractive, fit, curvy, strong, smart, and caring. I love my pre-op body and don’t think that will change. I’m on Testosterone and so becoming more androgynous slowly. I still look (pass) very female but have a larger clit, and more body hair. It delights me. I identify as a femmeboy and dress dandy most days, though I also love lacy lingerie.

I want cuddles, I want kink/BDSM, I want fun and fantasy, I want sexiness and creative play. I don’t want to be pushed beyond my sexual boundaries too quickly, I want someone willing to start out slow and sensually. Seduce me. I also want a kinky pervert, someone I can experiment, role play, and adventure with when we trust each other eventually. (I’ll throw out that a Sugar wouldn’t be unwelcome…).

I don’t want to keep coming out as trans every time I meet someone new. I’m not going to look the same in 6 months as I do now. Hopefully I can find people who are excited about that and want to watch me change… So here I am. Talk to me.

Put “Femmeboy” in the subject line and send me a pic. Tell me what you want and what you think…

  • do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers

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It’s slippery here in the middle, and I’ve made a life if it. Bi/omni/pan (re: Sexual), FemmeBoy, Artist and Producer, Feminist Testosterone taker, Drag King and Burlesquer, Actor cum Writer cum Director. In all things a shapeshifter… I want what I want and I do not want to pick sides. I want to be the full ocean I am inside, wearing it stylishly for all to admire and see. It’s hard to walk, balancing on the many lines, this way.

Questions are hard to answer truthfully without a paragraph’s worth of time, or the questioner’s understanding of complicated reality. Words shift their meaning between the textures of context. Thinking they have it pinned down finally, friends get frustrated with ambivalent explanations concerning my growth. I am many different shapes throughout my day.

It’s confusing for me too. It’s hard to learn one way of loving my body, and then look in the mirror and discover my hair’s grown too long or there are new physical developments surfacing. However, in between these constantly shifting realities I embrace the many more sides of knowing I can now see. It’s power and it’s magic, to put it simply.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

Please support my work on Patreon. For one time donations click here: Support the Artist 
~Thank you.

Banned Words, Concepts, and Lives

Please, if you enjoy my blog, contribute to my Patreon: www.Patreon.com/KarinWebb. This is the major way I am paid to write and create, and is currently the largest most steady source of income going to my rent and bills. Thank you, and Happy Holidays.

 

My response to this week (and the past year) as a citizen of the United States: We are all vulnerable to the corruption of those who would stand against a more equal nation which values and reflects our community’s true diversity. This idea is evidence-based, just look back over the past year’s shifting of policies nationwide which reflect protections of misguided entitlement over science-based agendas. As a transgender citizen of the United States, and as a citizen who happens to have a uterus, it looks as though by the end of our current presidency a fetus might have more rights over my body than I will.

Make no mistake, it is not a coincidence that women, queers, and racial minorities are the targets of an establishment which is patriarchal, older, male, cis, largely heteronormative, middle to upper class, and pervasively white, who would have their privileges upheld over people with reproductive abilities, alternative ideas about how and who to love or how to speak about their own identities and bodies, and those with skin colors who historically have been marginalized and abused. A community comprised of people who understand their individuated power to grow and over time better govern their bodies, hearts, and minds, a community which acts with respect to nature and understands the environment through science, evidence, and experience rather than dogmatic teachings is a community which will not much longer be repressed by the fossils of an abusive and repressive era. That some of the words I have used above (and I’m sure most of my ideas) are an abomination to our current governing body is remarkable.

Small minded.

Weak.

No, I’m not the CDC (Center for Disease Control and Prevention), but for the Federal Agency whose sole purpose is to keep the United States healthy to be limited by vocabulary (especially vocabulary accurately descriptive of its research) to receive funding, is not only ludicrous it is vile. I am a patriot, and I do not believe our current administration has the wellbeing of most of our nation’s people in its sight. I believe this administration to be actively hostile and hateful to the actual persons who comprise our nation.

Fuck. This. President.

Old man, shatter.

We “Other’d folk” growing healthy, strong, and demanding of our rights are the reality of natural growth and change.

Evangelicals: stay out of the Government. Your trifling is unconstitutional, and you cannot turn back nature’s progress meaningfully. Your attempts make you look a complete ass.

It is time for all of us who believe in the more perfect union achieved through equality and peace to not allow ourselves to be subdivided through the sting of “but me too” or “NotAll___” or fear of loss as the scales balance to favor all. We are on this Earth together, some more or differently blessed than others in circumstance and journey. It is up to each of us to utilize and to share what we possess to the benefit of all this planet’s creatures.

So be it.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

Please support my work on Patreon. For one time donations click here: Support the Artist 
~Thank you.

Hormones are REAL

A picture of me looking very tired but not like I’m allergic to everything! Simple pleasures.

Update from my last post: I started on Testosterone Enanthate (the new formula that hopefully I’m not allergic to) and it seems to be working really well! No more puffy dark circles under my eyes, weird facial puffiness or constant itching throughout my body for weeks on end at my injection sites, and at least for now no more mood swings making me feel strong one day and loathesome the next… I like it so far!

In other news I’m growing some chin hairs, and I have a darkening upper lip. In other other news I have a newfound understanding of the testosterone driven libido and I’d like to talk about that for a minute…

A friend of mine introduced the term “turbo slutting” to me the other day in response to telling them I was feeling insatiable sexually and had jumped head first into doing all the things about it. I finally understand dating apps with a “right now” edge to them. I never have before. It just happened one day — a light switch was turned on inside of me. One day I was regular ‘ol “interested in sex but not really Creature”, and the next day I was like… “mmmm I need to get on some gay boy dating apps STAT“! Elevated levels of testosterone coursing through my veins for the past few months has finally awoken my sexual interest in a way I have never experienced before. It’s marvelous… and exhausting. I’m also really enjoying feeling free and driven to seek out new sexual experiences.

All of the baggage I hold in my body and brain which has historically restrained me from being the slut I am in my fantasy world seems to have gotten shelved… Or more like it’s disintegrating and falling away. Hormone therapy has taken on a new dimension of meaning. If you read this blog you know I often talk about not being that into sex, while loving sexuality, kink, and sensuality. Right now, for a spell at least, it seems my libido is making up for lost time and really doesn’t give a fuck what play partners want as long as it’s hot and I get fucked about it in the end. It’s fascinating to me.

My experience of “right now” sex is a totally different headspace and emotional world than sexual connection was for me before. I feel like I understand “guys” on an entirely other level than I’ve ever been able to conceive of. I can see how most cis men and women are having completely different conversations about their needs surrounding sex and missing each other. The baseline experience surrounding sexual impulse is a completely different beast now that I’m taking testosterone, and I want to have all the conversations about what that means in our culture.

Hormonally I’m a teenage boy right now, and honestly I’m glad I’m 39 and not an inexperienced kid with an intense drive and no experience or street smarts or social supports to keep me and my partners safe. It makes me sad on a whole new level, experiencing what I’m experiencing, that this culture so represses and shuts down conversations about what the chemicals inside us make us think, want, and do as our sexualities come into focus, becoming more complex (and often fragile) instead of strong, resilient, articulate, and open.

I have a lot more to say about this subject, and honestly I wish I was part of a study on what it’s like to transition taking T. So many new understandings and insights are being felt in my body. It’s interesting to talk with some of the men I’ve been around lately too. I have been thinking over past conversations with lovers (male, female, and trans) about relationship needs and understanding my ex’s arguments surrounding sex in an entirely different way — a way I literally couldn’t even conceive of formerly. I also have a better handle on where they were probably not at all able to understand me.

More writing soon, my next blog will be a little more graphic about sexcapades… tune back in soon.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

Please support my work on Patreon. For one time donations click here: Support the Artist 
~Thank you.

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