Duct Tape and Coffee

Mummification with full hood and blindfold. The perfect footrest as I write…

I am sitting here with a black-and-white duct tape covered body by my feet. From knees down it’s clad prettily in lacy stalkings. It’s collared, a lead reverently placed down the center of its body, head encased in a full hood with blindfold. Jazz plays, and the smells of Copal and burnt Mugwort fill the air. My coffee has been made perfectly. It’s peaceful here, and I’m bound to this helpless body, just as they are surely bound to me.

When a submissive of mine has a hard time quieting their mind or tries to remain in control where they have no business messing with the steering wheel, it’s time to incorporate meditation into our practice. Letting go is one of the hardest things we have the pleasure of learning in this life. It’s a practice, a path, and an opportunity for deep connection. While D/s partners often utilize bondage within a scene, D/s is a form of bondage as well.

Anxiety, depression, hyper-vigilance, trust issues, and a million other personality quirks and commands of the central nervous system are soothed by meditation. Meditation can be practiced in a great number of ways, even within the realm of kink. What even is our adult playground, if not a place to seek out what centers and aligns our spirit with partners?

Mummification is a treat.
A dream.
A vision quest.
A hole of despair with an ending in sight.
An internal wrestle towards conversation.
A place of helplessness.
A space of deep stillness where one can work on the puzzle of acceptance…

Mummification commands that you will let go, rest, and be. It contains within it an ultimatum of nothingness where all that’s possible may reveal itself within the confines of your mind. It’s not for the claustrophobic—unless one is trying to overcome their fears with a safe, responsible, and understanding guide. I would also say that it’s not for people who don’t reasonably trust their Dom/top partner. It takes thoughtful negotiation to strip someone so thoroughly of their autonomy.

We are expansive on the inside, and taking away someone’s bodily control can provide a profound place to explore the inner realm. Without extraneous expectations, and armed with an earned trust securely in place, we are capable of incredible things. Out of stillness: visions, creativity, answers, and surprising depth can be ours. Sitting in front of a computer every day is not what puts us through our our corporeal paces, and in a million ways in this contemporary paradigm we’re robbed of true stillness even as we sit.

Today this body beneath my feet sobbed. This body breathed. This body went on a journey through the mind. This body rested. This body, even for just a few sacred moments, let go. This body’s heart, in turn, opened even more widely.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

This writing takes time, research, and consideration. It is my art.
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Our Bodies are Amazing

Whip marks

Our bodies are amazing. It’s simply true. Our skin is this incredible material which holds our innards in despite gravity, tearing, impact, burns, and broken bones inside its casing. Pain is this amazing tool that our bodies offer us in conversation. It proves a malleable experience which we can turn up or turn off the noise of depending on our emotional fortitude, our expectations, and our perception of our safety in that given moment. BDSM plays with these things, allowing us to find newer and newer spectrums of control through sheer force of will, and with the survival intelligence we are gifted from experience. Trust is built through trial and error, and over time our lines in the sand about what we believe we can tolerate moves further and further into the wild. Humans were built for adventure, for physical fortitude, and for intellectual and emotional growth. We get bigger from trying new things and from digestible challenge.

Mummification

I am grateful that I’ve found these communities of people who are as interested in what their bodies are capable of, what their hearts are capable of, what their creative intellects and wills are able to accomplish, as I am. I am proud of what my body has shown me it’s happy (and sometimes unhappy but able) to take. New experience after new experience has taught me more about myself than comfort ever could over the years. I am repeatedly astonished when my desires shift from fear and rejection of an idea, to intrigue, to want, and oftentimes to ease.

There was a moment in time (just a moment) when I considered being punched and “rough body play” to be an awful idea, I thought “who does that?!?!”… The very next day I was punched in a scene and as I felt the deep reverberations echo through my torso, sending pleasure to parts of my body I hadn’t felt come alive for a very long time, I knew this was one of my favorite things. I was angry that being born female had taken these feelings away from me for so long. Getting beat in scene was a reclaiming of my own skin and bones, an emotionally powerful and moving new understanding that I was capable of so much more than I had known.

Needles

Another awe was found hanging 20 feet above a crowd of hundreds with only 2 hooks pierced through my shoulder skin holding me up. I felt my skeleton and organs trying to escape the meatsack I am alongside gravity. Epidermis, I kiss your virtues. Pain is a mindgame where fact and fear wrestle it out over intense sensation, and the journey is a classroom of information recalibrating one’s reactions for many future moments to come.

If you want it to.

The offer is open to everyone.

Dare to walk on fire with someone who knows how, and you’ll learn.

Recently I found myself with fistfulls of needles, pricking, suturing, and tying flesh in formations I hadn’t ever done before. It was beautiful. A love of blood satisfied for the evening, and my sadistic pleasure centers served well. Balls tied to the ceiling and pulled on with weights, labia and nipples sutured and strung up as well, two human animals who love one another and who offered me their flesh I tied together, then needled ribcage to ribcage, and corseted together with string on the bed which was our playground… The chemicals of connection, a practice of breathing, the fuel of trust and desire, and an electrifying sensation from every spark of energy in the room passed back and forth between us all as minutes turned to hours. From this I was high and happy and grateful.

Never cease to be amazed.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

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~Thank you.

Actor Turned Director

Some of the tools I teach with…

I’ve been thinking about my fantasies a lot lately. I think I need to get a little black (and crimson?) book to write them down in… Fantasies are a beautiful stepping stone to scenario, and scenario is a gorgeous stop on the path to planning and play. I am thinking about fantasies because I want to play…

Who’s down for being mummified? Interrogated? Pierced, poked, slapped, hot waxed, led on a leash, stepped on, or wants my flesh therapeutically under their fingers? Anyone for being an ashtray? Pet? Gender bent? How about a power exchange role play? There are so many games which have been played on me that I am excited to flip the script about and Top or Dominate. My brain won’t stop ticking — it’s really quite amusing.

But what, Monsignor Karin?! Aren’t you a sub my boy? Yes! Well, I have been consistently for a number of years now… I’ve seeked out experiences and play from so many places, done extensive research on kinky things, taught classes and demo’d for workshops, helped partners, and I’ve been lucky (and occasionally unlucky) enough to play with a wide range of people doing inventive, nasty things to delight me. I think I’m ready to find some of my own playthings… Teaching has always brought me close to Dominance, I suppose. That role, Teacher, has kept me firmly in a place of Top with regularity for a few years. “Dominating” during class though is something I have divorced myself from the pleasure of… Recently I’ve had multiple experiences where the scales got tipped somehow. I found myself not just demonstrating “how to” but finding blurred lines and exciting new territory as the experience deepened (consensually) into scening and switch. Like my experiences moving from being an actor to Directing — I find incredible strength and pleasure from being able to communicate with my actors. I salivate while drawing out what is the best of theirs and pushing them to go a little further still, to find excellence before the end. I find I am empathic, understanding the feelings my own actor self might be experiencing in their process, riding the energy of the room as we unfold and find our scene. I leave excited about the connection and the work, happy to have helped… but more.

Something has opened in my heart recently. A desire to serve by lead. A readiness and a feeling of safety I haven’t felt before. An ease with my own self-worth, I think. It’s been this toy, tossed in the room, which I’ve been contemplating for awhile from the corner. I finally batted it about a bit… and then… then… well then, I got excited. Now I want to pounce some more.

It’s interesting that though I’ve considered (and loved) myself submissive, I’ve been intentionally building knowledge, opinions, experiences, connections, researching, teaching classes, and now finally a desire to move from sub, to sub who teaches, to sub who teaches and demos, to freshly blooming Dominant.

Does this mean I don’t want you to beat me up if we’ve got a good thing going?! HELL NO!!! Even therapists have therapists, teachers have teachers, and my sadistic ass didn’t get less masochistic… I don’t know that I’ll ever not want to be handled by a talented, loving, sadistic, hot-as-fuck D-type too… Even if the both of us, for a moment, maybe turn on you…

Play On My Friends,
~ Karin

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~Thank you.

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