Trust is such an important and slippery subject. It is at the root of many of our wins and losses, our ability to achieve, and our patterns of falling short… Trust is a thing that comes as natural as breath, or can be so hard to win over, sometimes it never settles in at all. Growth can bring trust, and experiences can take trust away. Sometimes we cannot even trust our own selves—our instinct, choices, or desires. Those we’re taught to trust without question prove time and time again to be untrustworthy—family members, church officials, politicians… What is trust? How do we generate it and where does it come from? How do we lose it and what methods help bring it back to us?

Growing up I remember trusting unless I was explicitly told not to. Adults knew things and could keep me safe crossing the street—but adults in vans with candy were not to be trusted. I remember wondering about the old man who would watch me and my sibling play in the park, offering us quarters for walking the balancing beam… was he to be trusted?

Of course my parents were trustworthy, but what about the time I was told I had to wear a shirt when I was outside gardening in the sun? I was told this by a shirtless father.

Where lies the balance of trust vs. misplaced trust? When an intimate friend is in the midst of a chaotic time of life and not communicating their needs well, this can lead to hurtful experiences and misaligned expectations. Do you trust that person still? For how long? In what ways? In what ways do you not? Are these things forever to influence the relationship?

Is the concept of trust simply a reflection of the trust we have in ourselves? I don’t think so, because to survive we need other people. To trust can be less of a choice in some instances than it might be a mandatory working state… though, is that truly trust?

Do we trust arguments more than make-ups? If we find this is so, is it possible to be involved long-term with a person you fight with or experience semi-regular conflict with? What is the ratio of balance for what amount of conflict robs us of our trust in partnership vs. feeling grounded with another person and easily capable of trusting them?

Do we trust the worst of people before we hope for the best from them? Do we trust the fantasy of a person over a proven reality which might be less sexy to define?

Is there a relation between one’s ability to trust and one’s potential for handling disappointment? Is this correlation simply illustrative of not managing expectations well? Are we influenced by both?

When we feel we can trust a person immediately, is that really trust or is it something else? What role do hormones, pheromones, interpersonal chemistry, and observation of recognizable behaviors play in developing and maintaining trust in others?

Can you learn to trust the way you can learn to read a book?

Is trust even trust? Might “trust” be the ability to see a number of options concerning future probabilities and be able to accept enough possibilities that it’s easy to stick to some sort of understood plan or brace gracefully against the inevitable?

Perhaps trust actually looks like “knowing” or “acceptance”, and has more to do with the depth of information we gather regarding our own selves and reactions to situations than it has to do with what others effectively play out around us?

Which sense in our own bodies do we most favorably trust?

Is trust one definable thing or is it more like a mood? Maybe trust is represented as multitudes of mediums we dance through in various ways as we encounter situations, beings, and things?

Is trust a story we tell ourselves to sleep at night? Is trust a spirituality we can be fanatic and agnostic about? Is trust mathematical? Chaotic? Teachable? Conscious or subconscious? Destiny?

Is trust a sword with which we carve out the shape of a life? If so, what skills and practices do we gather concerning trust?

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

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