Where I Am

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This is where I am
Here

In the present moment
I am in this very room with you
Do not be so foolish
As to take my statement for granted

The moment has never existed before
This is the first room
The room with windows

Windows I am not flying out of

There are escape hatches in my mind
Walk the hallways, brain twists right and left
You’ll see my many outs
Trapdoors, portals, windows, mouse holes, rotating library walls, curtains behind which the Bermuda Triangle takes her prisoners
And Siren songs whisper at each
I am pieced together corridors in a busy hotel, the rooms small and many
Just an inch or two away, through the thin skin of every cheaply made door
A different scenario awaits
Ready to trap my present being
Hide her in a place you cannot reach
And you might not see (these peepholes go but one way)
Behind my eyes these other sides

When you strike me, I breathe
The white heat of bite, fist grabbing hair, musk smell and instinct understood
Rabid primal intent
Without taking you have every drop
I open my lungs and concentrate
Breath is silence and immediate Now
Connection
You have plied me with play instead of bed
And listen
Encourage concoctions that keep me present
Spin a wheel made out of toys we’ve both been wanting to try
Games we think might work
Broken-in leathers that you know already fit
Reaching for ridiculous perfection in the outrageous play of our making
These illicit interactions have been placed in the public square of my mind
Daemons watching from peepholes an inch or two beyond our reach turn away frustrated, forgotten this time

So I came
And stayed
And we breathed together
Played
Here in this room
All the windows looking in on us this time
This first room
The room with windows
Windows I am not flying out of

###

To Breath and Being,
~ By Karin Webb

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~Thank you.

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