W is for WAND (the Electric kind)

Violet Wands are one of my favorite tools of the trade: they offer a range of sensations and accessories, you can turn them up and down to accommodate almost anyone’s acceptable sensitivity zone, if you’re a gear head you’re in heaven with all the pretty parts and pieces, the smell of ozone-mixed-with-overheated-flesh-and-burning-hair is fearsome and fantastic, and they bring out the “scared but interested” kid face in most people — all things I must say I absolutely revel in!

My first encounter with a wand was pretty boring. I got zapped, it didn’t really hurt, and I didn’t really see the appeal. My second encounter was during a very heavy interrogation scene. The wand was what broke me, in fact. Fun! After that I was hooked, and once even enjoyed a wand scene which lasted a couple hours and spanned a very diverse range of attachments. I felt like a cat being pet with edgy electric energy all over — it was incredibly sexy.

As a Dom/Top in the wide world of wands, the first time I wielded one was at Burning Man. I was part of a kinkster camp which was basically run by professional Dominants, BDSM teachers, and longtime scenesters. I taught a class while I was there called “Styles of Submission”, about the many different reasons people submit and what they’re each looking for from their Dominant in scene. I took a work shift as a “Dom on Duty” in their dungeon space. This meant I was available to answer questions to anyone passing by wondering what our camp was about, and I could offer kink experiences to people depending on what they were interested in trying out. We had some dungeon furniture set up, bondage equipment, sensation toys, impact toys, and one of the Professionals who was helping run the space had laid out her Violet Wand kit for our use. Sufficed to say, when some interested bloke wandered in and asked what it was like to be prodded with electricity, I found myself in scene arcing purple electric sparks onto his balls and watching amazedly as he dripped not a small amount of pre-come onto the sand below the spanking bench he was bent over… An inkling that I might someday become a proper Dom was definitely born. Since that day I’ve seduced more than one person into overcoming their fear of Violet Wands and electricity play. If there’s one thing I shine at, I’m pretty sure it’s making something overwhelming seem accessible while honoring safe play, listening intently to my sub, and creating experiences that are, in fact, enjoyable for all involved.

For my birthday this year I asked my community to fundraise for one of these very expensive toys, and my community came through for me! I ordered a kit boasting a bunch of fun attachments, and a heavy-duty wand model that will allow me to play for longer without having to cool down (something I know I’ll need). The wand boasts a higher range of intensity than others, a foot pedal for quick on/off/accessory switching ease, a grounding attachment which turns the entire body into an electrified playground, cat claws, and other fun and silly bits and pieces. It also features a tool for temporary and permanent branding, and a short length of electricity play compatible rope! I am more than excited to break this gorgeous instrument of pain and pleasure in.

Things to be aware of: Though Violet Wands are pretty safe, there are things you want to be aware of when using one. They are not compatible with people who have heart conditions, pacemakers, insulin pumps, or other electrically operating implants. You should know ahead of time if there are any metal knee or hip replacements in your victim. You don’t want to use your wand within a foot of metal implants. You need to make sure the wand is never wet, that the electricity supply you’re using is properly wired and safe, and that your equipment is in good working order with nothing burned out.

Violet wands function by converting your high voltage home electricity into a low watt, low amp, yet high frequency output similar to static electricity, but with an ongoing source so you can enjoy a steady shock instead of one quick zap and back to the shuffling around. The shock doesn’t penetrate very far into the skin and is fairly safe. Like I mentioned before, there are attachments which can cause branding to occur, and in general you want to keep the wand moving over someone’s body rather than holding it still in one area. The toy’s contact surface area must be pretty small and made of a very conductive material, like metal, for something as intense as branding to happen, but even with glass electrodes if you leave your zap on one area long enough, expect a light sunburn or petechiae to develop.

Danger mainly enters into the equation when something (wand or wiring or wet) isn’t working properly. It doesn’t happen often, and there are precautions you can put in place. Ground-Fault Circuit Interrupters (GFCIs) are an easy fix if you’re worried about a wiring malfunction. Keeping your toy clean, inspected, stored properly, serviced by a professional, and away from water will pretty much handle the rest. Other than that, just make sure you don’t electrocute things you don’t mean to! Remember that metal jewelry often conducts electricity at a high intensity, so consider removing it unless you plan on playing with it intentionally.

Warning: you will electrocute yourself. It happens. Don’t use a wand if you aren’t willing to get zapped yourself now and then by mistake. Most importantly though, start low and build up intensity. Not everyone has a very good tolerance for electrical sensations, and some people conduct electricity very easily while others just simply do not. The easiest way to make someone hate electrical play is by zapping them too intensely right away — and then all that money you spent on the thing has gone down the drain while you watch them throw “violet wand” on the red list. I’ve had the incredible experience of bringing people back into the electrical fold who had suffered such indecencies, and I have to say that while I’m always happy to convert people by working slowly and being trustworthy, it would be better if I never had a reason to…

If you ever get a chance to play with electricity in this way, I highly recommend trying it out. Have fun my Dr. Frankensteins! Oh, and if you’d like to add to my kit as a late birthday present, check out my Violet Wand Wishlist and send me a note.

Play On My Friends,
~ Creature

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~Thank you.

I is for INTERROGATION

Undercover costume complete...

Undercover Spy costume complete…

I mentioned a while back that “electricity is one of the only things that’s “broken” me (grinning as I say it)…“.  Now is the time for that particular story.  I welcome you to the wonderful world of INTERROGATION!

Seriously?!  Interrogation?:  Why yes.  Interrogation.  This word conjures up pictures of harsh lights on the suspect’s face, varied types of torture, manipulation of the accused, threats…  And those are just some of the ways you can make this desire come to life in a scene.  As you may or may not already think about, not all kink is about physical sensations.  Sometimes kinksters like to engage in the emotional or psychological realms in play, and interrogation is definitely one of the ideas I’ll talk about that moves further into emotional and psychological exploration (though it can incorporate a healthy dose of physical endurance as well).  Also, to be clear, interrogation is a more advanced subject/type of play, so please approach it with respect and a level of care that goes beyond some more straight forward endeavors you’d take on.

Ok, so what IS interrogation play?  As with most play, interrogation can be done very different ways, and to vastly different levels or ends, and for different reasons for every person participating in it.  Interrogation is a game where the Top/Interrogator is trying to get some bit of information from the bottom/interrogation subject before the scene ends, and employs all types of coercion to get it.  The information that is being chased can be anything from a person’s name, to a string of numbers, or another bit of information planted pre-scene into the subject’s consciousness, or it can be something more ‘real’ – a story or bit of real life information that the interrogator wants to have given over by their subject.  There are a lot of techniques which can be employed in the extraction of this information, and usually the toybag of a good interrogator contains tools that pull on the heartstrings and brainfolds of the person holding out, not only on their physical constitution or endurance.

The morning after Violet Wand torture thigh marks

The morning after Violet Wand torture

Negotiation:  Negotiation is arguably the most important part of a successful interrogation scene.  Unlike some types of play you might engage in, interrogation negotiation must be pretty extensive and cover territory you might not be used to covering.  Not only do the often asked questions about physical constitution apply (and you want to make sure you are rather rigorous about knowing as much as possible), but you want to know as much as you can about how the bottom might respond to emotional or psychological triggers.  You want to know if there *are* triggers this person is aware of, and how the person behaves when triggered.  You want to know what subjects to steer clear of when taunting them or pushing their buttons.  Interrogation can get mean, and because of this you want to make sure there is really clear communication about the use of safe words for reasons differing from physical fatigue.  Both the Top and bottom in the scene should feel comfortable stopping a scene in the middle of play if they feel something is off.  During an interrogation scene the combination of physical, emotional, and psychological manipulation can tire out a bottom more quickly than anyone thinks probable.  So spend time negotiating.  Spend a few weeks to a month or more planning with one another.  Do your research as an interrogator, and know how to come up from a scene if you find your bottom spiraling down to a place you feel is unhealthy or harmful.

Healing Process/Aftercare:  Just like negotiation the aftercare process will be one you want to make sure you are really clear about.  Depending on how well you know one another or how personally intense the interrogation gets, the bottom may or may not want to engage in a physically close and comforting type of aftercare.  The top in the this scene may have some more needs that usual too – they have, after all, ventured into a land of manipulation and possibly sadistic offense that may be hard for them to resolve in the aftermath.  Regardless, I like thinking of the aftercare of an interrogation scene (or kidnapping, rape play, any type of more emotional/psychologically intrusive play) as a healing process.  If the interrogation play went pretty far beyond anyone’s comfort zones you may be looking at weeks of healing rather than a few hours of cuddle.  Make sure you come out of the  scene giving one another the care and space you respectively need as well as making sure the top is checking in with the bottom a few day after, a week after, and possibly longer.  What might feel ok in the moment of the experience may prick the imagination of the person being interrogated and work at the fears and insecurities that already reside in that person’s psyche creating a triggered state after the scene has ended.  And it is possible to trigger the bottom during play without meaning to creating a situation where they may be looking at a longer process of healing or finding resolution than anyone set out to create.  Make sure you find one another in the aftermath supportively.

My very own dungeon torture interrogation scene:  I was interrogated by a good friend at a spy-themed kinky sex party a while back.  This was a person I was very comfortable playing with,  communicating openly with, someone I trusted and enjoyed, and who I felt I had a great creative rapport with.  We took a good couple months talking about the scene leading up to the party, covering as many negotiation points as we could think of.  Because I was planning this scene with a friend I trusted for an event that I knew I would know most of the people at, I felt very safe not knowing a certain amount of the details about how the scene would go down.  What I did know was that there would be at least one or two other people involved (and I had given my interrogator a list of trusted friends who I knew would be at the party), that the scene would be videotaped on a closed circuit camera and shown on a big TV screen in the “security surveillance room” at the party, that the scene wouldn’t be sexual in nature (but that sex could be threatened), that my physical limitations and hard limits were outlined clearly, that my scene partner knew what types of physical torture I could bear, what my emotional and psychological triggers were, and that we had a game plan for aftercare.  I had no idea what information the interrogator wanted from me, how the scene would begin or end, or what would be happening with me during the scene…

The party was a really fun success, everyone had dressed to the nines and had characters or various plans for the evening.  Before the party had really begun a someone slipped a piece of paper in my hand and I was instructed to memorize the information on it.  It was a series of numbers…  At some point early on in the night, completely out of the blue a bag was thrown over my head, I was held firmly by a couple of people, my legs and arms were quick tied, and I was slung over the shoulder of a large man and carried down to what I assumed was the venue’s dungeon space.

I couldn’t tell how many people were around me or involved in my kidnapping, but I started to recognize some of the voices around me, mainly my interrogator’s, as I was chained, hands over my head, standing, to an anchor point in the ceiling.  I was frisked, manhandled, and talked at for a time…  I can’t say my performer’s mind for script and witty repartee didn’t win out inviting my interrogator to be all the rougher and committed to his vicious role in this arrangement.  A lot of different things happened to me physically during this scene, at some point a spanking bench was employed, and various tools of the sadist’s delight…  The bag came off my head for a time, and was put back on – each time plunging me into darkness and questioning what might be coming next.  There was a bright lightbulb shone into my face upon removal of the bag, and other disorienting visual information on hand.  I realized at some point that beyond the light there was a line of chairs set up and party goers were sitting politely and with morbid fascination watching this scene unfold…  I was strapped into a bondage chair for most of the time with my head, neck, upper arms, forearms, thighs, shins, feet, and waist immobilized.  From that point the physical coercion came mostly from a Violet Wand and dog tag chain used as whipping implement (much more effective then you might think).  Outside of the physical situation though, I was surprised most by the persona of my captor.  He was easy and relaxed, slow to ask for what he wanted, friendly in his demeanor, and quick to remind me that we didn’t have to be enemies or at odds at all, it was entirely my own design if he had to resort to consequences for my failure to cooperate…  He did a really great job playing his part.  I was surprised at the mental exhaustion physical actions took.  Where usually I can bear a great deal of pain, this arrangement caused me to second guess my ability to overcome – to rethink how much I could actually resist, or even wanted to…

The scene progressed slowly and had a great arc to the storytelling.  Eventually I did utter the four numbers I had been told to memorize earlier, and I was comforted a while before being let loose to unwind and enjoy our aftercare.  I think it was a really great first interrogation scene, and I’d be happy to engage in this type of play again for sure.

Evidence of an evening well planned and beautifully played...

Evidence of an evening well planned and beautifully played…

More resources:  I’ll tell you once, and I’ll tell you a thousand times that Kink AcademyFetlife, and your local events are great places to go for more information.  The Kink Academy website hosts quite a few videos on the subject by Danorama (of the awesome duo that is Two Knotty Boys) that are quite good.  Here in New England, NELA and MOB are great resources as well.  In this instance I would really highly recommend talking with other people who have done interrogation before engaging in it yourself along with doing a fair amount of research first.  Have fun messing up your loved ones in the best and most responsible ways possible…

To Breath and Being,
~ Karin

If you like my blog, please check out my Patreon Page and consider supporting me, or just click here: Support the Artist

~Thank you.

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Be an ABCs contributor:  Have a story or perspective to share about kink or want to promote a kinky event?  Email Karin directly at: Karin@ABCsOfKink.com or fill out the as-anonymous-as-you-want-it-to-be feedback form below and you could see your writing published as a part of Wednesday’s “Perspectives on Kink: Conversations with the Community” blog on this site.  Don’t know what to write about?  Consider answering some of the Survey Questions I posted recently.  Happy writing, and thanks!

E is for E-STIM

Growing up, my father worked as an electrician/electrical engineer, and later on in my own life I became a lighting tech for theaters and special event companies.  I’ve always felt a kinship with electricity, both in the sense that there is an “electrical” connection between certain people, and in the manipulation of it physically.  Today, E is for E-Stim which stands for “electrical stimulation”.

To start out, here are the top two things you MUST remember when thinking about playing with electricity:

  1. Safety!
  2. No, really, SAFETY, so do your research or die – maybe literally.
"The Princess Bride"

“…So I want you to be totally honest with me on the way the machine makes you feel.  This being our first try, I’ll use the lowest setting.”

Now that we’ve got those two rules down, there are a great many ways you can play with electrical stimulation and have a really fun time.  This is especially true these days because there are plethora of delightful, intelligent, kinky, amazingly perverted toymakers and inventors out there who have created toys specifically with electrical play safety in mind.   I recommend starting out on your journey by trying those products on for size and learning as much as you can about how the beast works before getting too creative.

What are some of these safer toys and devices you speak of?  Since we’ve established that electricity will kill you as soon as look at you, and to MAKE SURE WHAT YOU ARE USING IS MEANT FOR USE ON A LIVING BODY AND BEING USED SAFELY, lets run over some toys that are meant to be used on people:

What else?  There are forums like www.smartstim.com, along with groups and resources on Fetlife and other kink communities that are created to help people understand how e-stim works and what is safe, unsafe and possible in electrical play.  I recommend checking out group forums like these at the very least for research information and general advice, and at best for great ideas, conversations, and to clear up misconceptions you might have about how people do what they seem to be doing.  Having an account on Fetlife or Kink Academy or some other social or educational website can help you move from cautious novice, to well practicing intermediate, leading of course to highly prized kink wizard!

My thigh the day after Violet Wand Torture :)

My thigh the day after Violet Wand Torture

My Experiences: Have been very slim as of yet, though what I’ve felt I’ve liked and hated in the best combination possible.  Electricity is one of the only things that’s “broken” me (grinning as I say it), but more on that particular scene in my interrogation entry…  Specifically, when it comes to electricity I’ve played with the Violet Wand, so I can speak to that one quite well.  It has a lot of different attachments, some beautiful, some more intense than others, some feel like massage, some more bizarre.  What I like most is the attachment you can stick in your belt to electrify your hand which basically makes YOU the electrical toy, and your touch torturous.  I will admit one of the things I REALLY like about that is that the sadistic partner you have is also feeling what you’re feeling – serves them right.

Through extensive use of the Violet Wand I have gotten a light “sunburn” over the more sensitive area that was repeatedly shocked (inner thighs), but that cleared up completely within a day or so.  All in all really fun stuff, that Violet Wand.

Why E-Stim, what’s going on there?  Electrical stimulation works in two different ways depending on the type of tool you’re using: either by a static shock, or by deeper stimulation of the muscles.  Toys like the Violet Wand operate more superficially building up and creating a static shock on top of the skin.  Toys like TENS units and Stun Guns directly target deeper muscles by overloading the electrical current that naturally occur in the muscles thereby seizing the muscle up and temporarily paralyzing it by making it contract.

Thoughts to Think About:  There are general guidelines to keep in mind when playing with any type of electricity, and more specific things to think about depending on the type of e-stim toy you’re using.  ALWAYS READ THE WARNINGS AND PROPER USE DOCUMENTS THAT COME WITH YOUR EQUIPMENT.  Know what kind of questions to bring up in negotiation with your partner:  does your partner have epilepsy or a pacemaker?  Does your partner have any heart issues, bad circulation, or a history of blood clotting?  This is a non-exhaustive list, so know specifically what your equipment warns about on top of these concerns.

Communicate Communicate Communicate…  Need I say more?  Try your toys out on yourself first so you know what type of sensation you’re doling out.  Check in with your partner about what the sensations are like for them as you play – is this too much, can you take more (?)…  Decompress about what happened in a scene afterward, was it good, bad, ugly, pleasurable, scary, fun.  If you want to do it again figure out what you’d like to try next time and what you should stay away from repeating.  Don’t break the toys – your machines or your human ones!

Have fun and remember that no matter how consensually evil you might be being to one another, you’re on the same team and in this together.

To Breath and Being,
~ Karin

If you like my blog, please check out my Patreon Page and consider supporting me, or just click here: Support the Artist

~Thank you.

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